Grieving!

Yesterday morning, I went with my mom to a Holiday Grievance Seminar. It was a time to give us strategies, ideas, and encouragement on how to get through the holiday's without your loved one. We heard stories from others that about their specific loved ones and how special they were. I was so happy to be there with my mom. See, when my dad passed away in March, I had to keep going. I had two kids and had to keep homeschooling a trucking along to finish the school year. Because of that, I don't think I grieved the best way. I'd wait until night and just crash and cry. I would try and stay strong for mom and especially for my daughter Katelyn who has so many questions. I cried when she cried and held her when she needed holding. She did see my struggle, which I think is healthy for me and her. But, the bawling, anger, and frustration with it all came out when she wasn't looking. So, I didn't have all cry fests(which i probably should have) to heal and grieve. Going to this seminar helped me release a lot in a safe environment.

One of the breakout sessions was Writing. We had to write down words about things that were special to dad. We brought in pictures of him on all of his Harley's he had and built through his life. So some of my words described a motorcylce: heavy, loud, strong. And then describing my dad: Intelligent, teacher, carefree, loving,etc,. After we wrote those words we had to write a story with the words in it. It could be imaginary, real, not make sense, and so on. Well, I wrote a story and thought I'd share with all of you. It's short and is real but I have a different name and what I am going through is made to be another lesson. Enjoy!

        Nicole was taught to do many things by her father. She was taught how to fix things and work with her hands. But this new project and lesson was heavy. It was too much for her to handle and do. It made her sad and she wanted to shout very loud in frustration. She knew not to worry and to be carefree like her father. She wanted to be selfless and work on it alone so not to bother anyone else.
        Nicole knew she was taught by an intelligent teacher who had so much love for her. She didn't want to live with this hard project to do. She couldn't answer the questions or fix this one. Nicole had to do this new project without her father and loving teacher. She didn't know if she could do it.

Samuel Lucas.....our youngest rockstar.

I have no idea how it happened, but our little Samuel loves to drum more than any of you can even fathom. Everywhere we go, he drums. Eating out, he drums. At church, makes his way to the drums on stage, and drums. At home, pulls out pots and pans at least 3 times a day, and he drums. In his high chair with his fork, he drums. Playing trains, he drums. Riding in the car, he drums ( or plays air guitar and sometimes calls it banjo, depending on the type of music). I am amazed that he just wants to do drums ALL THE TIME!!! He is only 2 and none of us drum. He must have seen it at some point and completely fell in love with it. To be honest, he's actually pretty good. He keeps a beat, bobs his head, and taps his foot. Sometimes he makes up a song while doing and sometimes he's completely quiet.

This past Saturday afternoon, we heard the pots and pans being taken out and placed ever so perfectly from biggest to smallest, just the way he likes them. We heard the junk drawer open and 2 pencils being taken out. We decided we would capture a little bit on video this time. I love it so much that I had to share. Check out my youngest rockstar, because big sister is also all about rocking it out!!!

http://youtu.be/n5kpsYtLf0I
fyi: he has one of my headbands on his forehead. I guess that was for dramatis effect....LOL!!!!



......and here he is.....cutest drummer I know!!!

Psalm 127

Some of you were very interested in the post I did about our church learning a different Psalm every month by learning it to music (by Jamie Soles). This month we are learning Psalm 127. I thought I'd post Psalm 127 for those of you want to learn while we do.

Psalm 127

A song of ascents. Of Solomon. ¹ Unless the LORD builds the house,
   the builders labor in vain.
Unless the LORD watches over the city,
   the guards stand watch in vain.
² In vain you rise early
   and stay up late,
toiling for food to eat—
   for he grants sleep to^[a] those he loves.
 ³ Children are a heritage from the LORD,
   offspring a reward from him.
⁴ Like arrows in the hands of a warrior
   are children born in one’s youth.
⁵ Blessed is the man
   whose quiver is full of them.
They will not be put to shame
   when they contend with their opponents in court.

I can't wait to learn this scripture and the meaning in each verse as we go through it each Sunday. It seems it is going to touch parents hearts with so much emphasis on children. VERY EXCITING!!!

It is not UNSEEN!!!

I have to admit(and my husband would agree) that I am capable of many pity parties in a week. Especially if its a week where I am not feeling well physically and can't get all the things done I want. I literally am moving all day long, mentally and physically(why am I not skinnier?) I wake up to a 2 year old screaming because that's how he tells us he's awake. From that moment on, it is one thing after another. Breakfast, Bible, Laundry, Math, Language, Changing diapers, Lunch, History, Science, Playing Trains, Singing ABC songs, Rocking to Sleep, Shower (maybe), Checking messages and e-mails, Picking up toys and whatever else gets thrown all over, and etc....etc....etc.... This week, I felt unappreciated. I saw all these things I do and know God has called me to do and I felt unseen. I wondered if anybody notices all that I do in a day. I wondered why I don't get sick days (although my husband stayed home to let me rest). I wondered if I didn't do any of it, would it get done. Lastly, I wondered if Josh and my children knew how much I do and sacrifice to make this house a home.

Finally, I came to a conclusion. I am never unseen by my Savior. He sees day and day out. He knows every struggle when teaching Math and every shirt I fold and refold. He sees when I am tired and when I  get frustrated at the dishwasher for not cleaning well. More than anything, He sees me!!! The good and the bad, the dirty and the clean, the wise and the unwise. He walks with me in it everyday. I am always seen and appreciated by Him and that is the only one I am working for. He is the audience and I am thankful for that. So while I had my pity party, I learned something about God. He gives me strength on those days and takes over when I can't handle any more. He also helps me to get up, suck it up, and work hard unto Him and not man. My husband and children do appreciate me but not more than Him!!!

the IMMODESTY of Halloween.

Ok. I just can't stay quiet on this subject. I have always been a person who speaks about modesty and the way girls and women should dress, especially if they claim to know Christ. So, those of you who read this can take it or leave it. God's word makes it very clear about the way we present ourselves:
     
Do not offer the parts of your body to sin, as instruments of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God, as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer the parts of your body to Him as instruments of righteousness.
~Romans 6:13~

Now, I know that some girls would say, " Hey, its not my sin, it's the sin of the guy looking". NOT TRUE!!!! Take Romans 14:21," It is better not to eat meat or drink wine or to do ANYTHING ELSE that will cause your BROTHER to fall." Sounds like it is the girl's sin too if you claim to live by scripture. When we cause our brother's to stumble which is the word, lust, we are sinning as well. I have never understood why girl's and women do not care about what we do to the men around us. More than anything, this is a heart issue. It is not a clothing or changing the outside issue. IT IS OUR HEARTS. Now, when I quote scripture, I am talking to those girl's and women who claim to know Christ. Are you dressing in a way that is honoring to the Lord? Can you honestly say it doesn't matter?

Now, to get back to Halloween. It seems like every year the costumes get closer and closer to women and even GIRL'S wearing the least amount of material as possible. Some of you would never where that on any other day but because its Halloween, GO FOR IT!!! The one time of year where I can just go crazy and not care what I am doing to the men around me, who by the way, may have wives or may be trying so hard to live a godly life. How disrespectful to God, yourself, those men, and the women they are married to. I wish so much that girl's and women understood the awesome way God sees them. He died for us. Is that not enough to bring us to a place of holiness and consideration of His word? We all have sin. I have things I struggle with daily. I am no where near perfect and never will be. I strive each day to live closer to my Savior and live in a way that pleases Him. But when we blatantly and consciously dress in a way that dishonors Him and cause those around us to sin, we are not living the incredible life God wants for us. I just want us, WOMEN, to see the impact we could have on the world when we actually live like Christians. When we follow His word, when we seek His face, and when we see ourselves and bodies as TEMPLES, then we can understand why what we wear matters. Why do we do it??? Ask yourself, why do you do it?? Attention, feel better about yourself?? Make a man wanna know your heart. I am so glad I am married to a man who loved my modesty and cherished that part of me. Halloween and any other day of the year is another day to show Christ to those around us. God should be honored and glorified EVERYDAY with how we present Him and Christianity.

 " Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the RENEWING of you MIND. The you will be able to test and approve what is God's will-His good, pleasing, and perfect will." 
~Romans 12:2~

I could go on and on and if you wanna talk more, let me know. I'll leave you with a quote from Albert Einstein:
" If most of us are ashamed of shabby clothes,...let us be more ashamed of shabby ideas and shoddy philiosophies....it would be a sad situation if the wrapper were better than the meat wrapped up inside it".

LOVE!!!!!!!

I read today about the Love we have been shown by Jesus' and how we should respond to that by the way we love others. John 15:11-12 says, " These things I have spoken to you, that My joy may remain in you, and that your joy may be full. This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you." I can love the people who are easy to love. I can love the people who deserve love. I can love people who I feel sorry for. It is very difficult to love the unlovable. It is also difficult to love those who have not shown love to me. As I read today, I understood that Jesus loved the unlovable and the people who hated Him. He was mocked, ridiculed, and laughed at by the very people that He came to die for. Now that's LOVE!!! Dying for the mockers. As, I continued to read, I came to a realization: Christians have a really hard time loving other Christians. Jealousy, pride, selfishness, and envy. Those are the reasons we don't love each other. Oh we say we do. We will even do ministry together in the name of love, but when it comes down to it, we do not SHOW THE LOVE OF CHRIST TO ONE ANOTHER!!! I have been the Christian who has not showed the love of Christ and numerous times been the Christian who is not shown the love of Christ by my Christian "friends". Why do we do it? Jesus preached about unity in the body of Christ. I think sometimes we let the human part of us that is imperfect and sinful take over and the Spirit is hushed and pushed aside. I find it so hard to push that sinful part aside on a daily basis. I am so imperfect and evil apart from Christ and the Holy Spirit living in me. I cannot love the way Christ loves if I am not constantly walking in the Spirit.

Josh and I are embarking on a crazy journey. We will and are already feeling the spiritual attacks that come along with following the Lord's call on our lives. We know there are so many more to come. More than anything, we need our brothers and sisters in Christ to come alongside us in this season of life. As I studied LOVE this morning, I thought of all the wonderful people that have loved us through some tough times and are still loving us through this crazy time. We need it, that's for sure. God has blessed us and continues to change things up and show us that He is in control. So, I leave you with this verse and pray you will walk in love this week.

    Beloved, let us love one another; for love is of God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. He who does not love does not know God, for God is love.
                                                                                                                  1 John 4:7-8

Psalm 15

At our church, we learn a Psalm a month. It is put to music so we learn it very easily. The best part is that our kids are learning it too and we can listen to it in the car and sing it at home. I love this because as Christians, we should be memorizing scripture. Better than that, my children are memorizing the same scripture at the same time and they like it because they get to sing it. This month we are doing Psalm 15. Each Sunday, Bobby, one of the Pastor's goes over verse by verse what the scripture means. So, as we memorize it we are also learning what God is saying to us through David's prayers. I love doing this so much. I really started loving it when yesterday, after our Bible time, Katelyn grabbed her Bible and opened it to Psalm 15. She started singing the Psalm and asked us to join. So, we spent the beginning of our morning singing scripture. It was such a blessing to do this as a family and that my daughter took the initiative to start singing. It was wonderful. There have been lots of scripture set to music but I like these because it is word for word the verses. They don't take anything out or add to it. IT IS AWESOME!!!

The artist that makes these songs is named Jamie Soles. You can download his songs(scriptures) on Amazon for $.99. NOT BAD!!! He also has a website you can go to and pick different things: http://www.solmusic.ca/discography/pure-words.php. I hope that this will encourage you to be sharing Bible time and scriptures with your children. Singing with them is so much and fun and any age would love to sing these songs. When I think about doing these things with our children I remember Deuteronomy 6:6-7 and 9

     " And these words which I command to you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down and when you rise up....You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates."